Tag Archives: finances

Mismated For Money (Men And Women Who Date Others For Financial Reasons)

June 22, 2016

Young man text messaging with young woman sleeping

Life can get complicated sometimes. People work to earn a living, but sometimes it is not enough to live the lifestyle they want. People think about financial security and sometimes it leads to poor choices. Sometimes people sacrifice love for money.

Most think women are the only ones who do this, regarding dating and or marrying a man for his money, while not being in love with him. However, there are men who date and or marry women they do not love nor are they attracted to, but go through with it because the woman has a good job or is wealthy and can provide financial security.

It is not right to deceive someone into thinking you are in love with them or love them, when you are only with them for money. You should want more for yourself than that. Nothing beats being in love. It’s great.

However, getting into a loveless relationship or marriage is not worth it, as it will break your heart and you will come to the cold, emotionally painful realization that money can’t buy love or happiness.

Remember, God knows your heart and true intent – and life can take some strange, unexpected turns. Do not go around using people. It will come back to you. Do not sacrifice your happiness, well-being and future with someone you do not love.

I know people this has happened to, who seriously regret dating/marrying someone for their money.

Furthermore, God expects you to marry those in the faith. It is a principle Christians adhere to (Jews and Muslims do as well regarding their respective religions). The Bible says, “Be not mismated with unbelievers.” Yet some Christians are doing this to disastrous results, all because the person is attractive, famous and or wealthy. You’re supposed to date and eventually marry a fellow believer (Christian) you are in love with, of any race, whether they are rich or poor, famous or not.

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WOMEN DATING OR MARRYING FOR MONEY

In one case, a person I know was in love with a guy who didn’t have any money. She adored him though. However, he was broke and that was a problem in her eyes. A man who had just made a million dollars started pursuing her, so she dumped the broke guy.

She went out with the guy that had just made the million dollars, then she married him, though she did not love him. Not long after things began to go terribly wrong. She went through a lot of emotional pain and disappointment and he ended up broke due to career problems and bad investments. It ended in a painful and acrimonious divorce. He realized she did not love him and even fathered children with someone else during the marriage. To make matters worse, the man she had actually loved who was broke, got his act together and became a medical professional who makes a big salary.

Some of you need to learn to work with the people you love, who may not have much now, but you can grow together. Money isn’t everything. Love is more important.

MEN DATING OR MARRYING FOR MONEY

Another case I know of, regarding a man who makes a decent salary, but does not think it will be enough to live the middle class or wealthy lifestyle he wants for the rest of his days, in trying to emulate his millionaire boss. So, he (a believer) sacrificed love by dating a woman (an atheist) he does not love and is not attracted to, whom everyone in his life thinks is wrong for him.

He is quite good looking, where people do not use that term in reference to her (I don’t want to be mean). When they go out, people stare at them like the odd couple for this reason, as he is good looking and that’s not her strong point. He is also well built. In reverse, it is the equivalent of what people call an average looking guy going out with a gorgeous woman – people stare and wonder how it happened and what’s going on (looking at the gorgeous woman wondering if the guy is holding her hostage or something LOL).

People openly wonder what they are doing dating each other. She likes the fact that he is good looking but people are looking at them for the wrong reasons. As stated above, people are wondering and commenting on why they are dating, due to the difference in looks. I don’t like writing about people’s looks, because at the end of the day, we are born looking how we look, beautiful or not and had no input on the matter. However, society looks at these things.

She is also hoping to use him to make money, as he has potential, but to be dating someone he is not attracted to, placing money first, he is showing he does not have enough confidence in himself and his earning ability. She is not rich, but has a fairly decent paying job. She has used her job skills and helped him make money. She also pays for things and at times has given him money. This is how she got him to go out with her in the first place, because as stated above, he is not in love with her nor is he attracted to her and his friends know this.

His friends know he is using her. His friends do not approve of the relationship. His parents worry he is sacrificing his own happiness over money in dating someone they know he does not love nor is he in love with her in any measure.

She, so desperate to cling to this good looking man, has turned it into hero worship complimenting everything he does, right or wrong, which is insincere and dangerous, as at times it leads to him making choices that are not in his best interest. His friends have witnessed this as well. People need others in their lives who tell them the truth for their own good.

He and the woman should have been business associates/friends at most, not lovers. However, to encourage her to continue to help him and to thank her for helping him make a bit of money, he started taking her out and having sex with her, leading her on, which is highly inappropriate, misleading and unethical.

So, this man has been dating this woman for money. However, her job/career is in jeopardy and he is going to promptly leave her when he figures it out, as money is the only reason he is dating her. To complicate matters, after dating her for a while, he started to cheat on her.  To complicate matters even more, recently he fell in love with a woman he met online who is similar to him, as they have a lot in common. However, he wrongly thinks she is broke and wants the modest sum of money he has in the bank. Little does he know she has more assets and money in trust than he and his girlfriend combined. She just pretends to be broke (LOL).

The moral of the story is do not date or marry people for money. It will backfire. It is better to choose a poor person you love than a rich one you do not, because you will end up miserable if you make the choice based on financial security (not to mention, money can go overnight, it’s happened to many).

People also get used to and sometimes grow tired of money, failing to see it as they once did, but you never grow tired of truly being in love. It doesn’t matter what color or country the person you love comes from, but choose them because you love them…not their money.

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